Wednesday, April 30, 2014

The race with ivf

Aunt Flo is still nowhere to be seen... We are leaving the country on May21st as my ER date is on May14th, leaving us one week to go home and tight loose ends. But still no period -_-! After the last cycle my rest-cycle-period was delayed for 8 days!!! Does it seem like we are on that old track again? Hmmmmmm....I hope not!

Sunday, April 27, 2014

Last day of priming!

Finished meds yesterday now will wait for the period to arrive to start stim! :D

Friday, April 18, 2014

Priming cycle updates

Today is the first day that progesterone is added to my cycle, actually I'm a day late, not reading my calendar careful enough, again. Almost as soon as I applied the gel capsule nausea came by, very pleasantly.  Just another 11 days of it..........
Other than the cycle, in this otherwise very petit world unrelated to babe making, I'm in a dark, tiring place as we are wrapping up for the summer, where there will be even more obligations that I'm not entirely sure is worth losing sleeps over.  A career v.s a dream, can't I have both???
However it's SO great to see some people archiving success with various stages of their treatments at CCRM, it really raises our hopes... Is this a good thing? Although I've convinced myself that I am prepared to fail our last attempt for hopes to have biological children, it would still be very hard to get through the first couple of days...dreadful thoughts, I know.
I actually had a very enlightening conversation with my mom last week, who is an extremely independent person currently taking a hike in Amsterdam. I told her to make sure that she visits the "coffee shop" for some "brownies", she didn't take the joke--Or did she?  Anyway growing up my mom has always been very cautious and hesitant when it comes to sex education. As result we could never talk about sex, so we never did. I figured everything out eventually, but it would have been easier if I could speak to her about it during puberty....for the first time, we spoke about fertility, and my infertility. Funny she never had any problem conceiving, it was actually more of the opposite for her, funny how life works.  She knew what we have been going through, even though I do not want her to share my constant grief, she senses it anyway.  It's hard to admit, but my mom is almost aways right about me.  I told her about CCRM and she is thrilled that we are still trying.  A few years back she casually predicated that I will be pregnant in the year of horse, and here it is, the year of horse! Let's hope she is right, again...

Friday, April 4, 2014


As I waited for my period to arrive, I made 2 calls to my nurse: one to inform her that we were still alive post cycle; second to ask if there were tests needed to done on day2 of my period.  Upon the 2nd call from yesterday I was reminded that Testosterone, CBC and chemistry "needed to be done" before the period.  I immediately felt frustration rushing to my head, because the flow was already late and obviously on her way.  If it shows up before I could take the test, would I still be able to start priming? Further, if the numbers come back less than good, would they let me continue priming?? Why why why didn't she tell me about this when I called her a week ago???????
So I called again, and spoke to another nurse who informed me that no day2 is required for priming, so that's good.

When I did get the lab request, I did something bad, (or at least unethical): I marked the results "same day" and "STAT" on my own, which not only calls for it to come back on the same day, it would also be an emergency request so it's pretty much guaranteed to be received by CCRM within a few hours. I was so nervous about the lab doesn't come back in time until CCRM closes and I don't get to start priming or have to stop priming. In my previous cycle, I nearly had to cancel my priming due to a few miscommunications between me and my nurse.  That's how I learned to be on my own BALL and not completely rely on the nurse. However it left a very bitter taste in my braincells, having to make 10 calls to track my results on both ends, worrying to death that ccrm doesn't get results in time and my cycle would be affected..Anyway, after the blood draw I confessed to a ccrm nurse since mine wasn't in. She scolded me, very politely, saying if the tests are marked "STAT", the doctor might get a call in the mid-night and he "wouldn't be happy" about it. I wholeheartedly agree. Who wants to get a work call in the middle of night? She did let know that they intended to have me start priming regardless of the tests, so my action was not even necessary at the end.

But I will most certainly commit the "crime" again, when it comes to my cycle, just as CCRM gets very meticulous when it comes to collecting their payments. I'm not in anyway encouraging anyone to do the same, but there has to be a silver lining for the patients. When miscommunication/errors happen, and everyone is busy dodging responsibilities, the patients suffer. All I want, is to go through this last cycle without any headache/problems, I don't think we could take more headaches at this point...

Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Prime cycle #2

Yesterday I called my nurse again, as my lady flow was due 2 days ago but still haven't shown her ever lasting presence. My nurse reminded me that they need CBC, testostrone and another text before my period. Great, no one ever contacted me about these test, and I just spoke with her last week to let her know that I'll be calling around my period.... Typical.
Then the lady flow came last night, also came mid night cramp and terrible sleep, now I'm feeling like a zombie. Had to call again for the day2 test & calendar. It's quite a drive to the lab that offers same day testing, I'm hoping someone sends me the order so I can do all two at once.
Update: another nurse called, no day2 is needed for priming cycle but a day14 testostrone check, and I thought I had learned everything... My tentative retrieval date is May14th, cutting close to our planned departing date for vacation and I'm trying to brain storm how to get the vaccine done for our  fur was a huge pain last year just the cat alone, this year we are adding Mizart to the squat, more complications...!