Out fishing...!

DH and I decided take a short trip into the Catskills today. As we were pulling out the garage, we called to confirm our reservation, only to learn that our reservation actually "fell through", so we thought why not just throw ourselves out here and see where we end up?

Poptar for breakfast :)

  

The snow was beautiful, the drive was smooth and scenic.  I was so fed up with noises of the city (NY! Go figure!); the constant heartache in our IF treatment; the lack of trees and nature, that I really really really wanted to be AWAY from it all, for a day. We drove by several places along the Catskills mountain but sadly the Inns were mostly all closed, or door's open but no one around...

 

 

 

 Finally we came up to Hunter Mountain, a pretty awesome ski spot town.  Luckily finding a room here was easy, and they are reasonably priced because it's during the week (no need to haggle!) and the place is new construction so things are nice and bright.  I was prepared to stay in a dark stinky motel since we didn't have any plans hatched :)

 I don't think I am (mentally) fully aware (or want to) of how stressful the last 3 years have been for us, both of us.  Our lives were militarized  Every month I follow the safe protocol -- AF --> day 2 blood & u/s --> back in 6 days blood & u/s --> OPK --> Trigger----------------------------------> BFN; ----->AF...........by now I'm so familiar with the systems that I can practically write a manual for the new patients (It's amazing my clinic hasn't dropped me). ..Like someone said, when she is in her treatment, life seems to be promising... My heart throbs with the thought of somehow, this time, our dream might come true -- meanwhile I feel increasingly embarrassed seeing the same staffs over and over and over again.  I sense the genuinely sorriness they feel for me, but I just kept coming back... Last night I dreamed that I had a positive hpt, which I immediately corrected myself--in my own dream! 
Now I'm really beat, my head feels like it's stuffed with cotton (my writing probably doesn't make much sense at this point). DH is out picking up some Chinese, poor guy, he was so excited for the exotic cuisines in the local restaurants...

 

Well, good night! Y'all!